The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 7, 2009 11:31:40 GMT -5
(Day 1) (we see The Sam in a gym with Lanny Poffo) The Sam - Thanks Lanny for helping me get back into fighting fit condition for this Monday.Lanny - No problem Sam.The Sam - So Lanny, what are we going to do today?Lanny - Well first off we are going to stretch.The Sam - Sounds fair.Lanny - Then, we will each hop aboard one of these beautiful Gazelle Exercise Machines, sponsored by Tony Little. This machine will exercise everything, your biceps, your triceps, your abs, your quads, you glutes, you boots, your tendons, your brain, you name it Sam and this machine will exercise it.The Sam - Wow Lanny! But a machine like that must cost a fortune!Lanny - Think again Sam, what would you say if I told you you could have the Gazelle exercise machine and training video for as little as $184.The Sam - UNBELIEVABLE!!!Lanny - But it gets even better, order now and you will receive a free copy of my book, Leaping Lanny's Wrestling with Rhyme. The Sam - So let me get this straight? If I call now I will get The Gazelle exercise machine? The Gazelle exercise training video? And the "Wrestling with Rhyme" for the low, low price of $184?Lanny - Absolutely Sam, also I will throw in a set of Stainless Steel Knives to the first 10 callers. The Sam - Wow! Thanks Lanny, you really helped me out.Lanny - My pleasure Sam, and just remember, The Brain is a muscle which needs as much exercise as any other muscle in your body.The Sam - Thanks Lanny, see ya later.(The Sam leaves the gym) The Sam - ....Wait a minute?Tune in tomorrow to see The Sam train with a former WWE Champion |
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Eli
New Member
Wat up mah gangstah$?
Posts: 14
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Post by Eli on Apr 7, 2009 22:44:59 GMT -5
Heh. Where have I seen this before? Unsuccessful training? Hm, must be deja vu.
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 7, 2009 23:38:18 GMT -5
Heh. Where have I seen this before? Unsuccessful training? Hm, must be deja vu.
And then there was that fan who interfered in the match. |
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Eli
New Member
Wat up mah gangstah$?
Posts: 14
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Post by Eli on Apr 8, 2009 7:56:39 GMT -5
Heh. Where have I seen this before? Unsuccessful training? Hm, must be deja vu.
And then there was that fan who interfered in the match. |
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 8, 2009 8:27:02 GMT -5
Except this time I am not going to get screwed out of a win by some fat, digusting, stinky woman!
And then there was that fan who interfered in the match.
And me not belonging in the ring? Listen, you may find this hard to comprehend because you are a Woman and therefore you don't have a brain. But i'm going to explain this to you nice and slow. YOU! ARE! A! WOMAN! And therefore you don't belong in the ring. Frank Gotch, George Hackenshmidt and Ed Lewis would be rolling over in their graves if they saw a....woman in the dignified sport of wrestling.
So listen close and listen well, There are only 2 places a woman belongs, in the kitchen or the bedroom. So why don't you get a cab to either, because as everyone knows, Women can't drive.
Now if you excuse me, I have a training session to attend. |
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 8, 2009 8:52:15 GMT -5
(Day 2)
(we see The Sam standing in a wrestling ring)
The Sam - Listen, i want to thankyou in advance for helping me get rid of the ring rust. I have to say I'm a big fan of yours and have always admired not just your wrestling ability, but your out of the ring work as well. So, will you help me Bob Backlund?
(we pan to see Bob Backlund wearing a 100% Grey Wool Suit with Red Bow Tie)
Backlund - THAT'S MR BOB BACKLUND TO YOU!
The Sam - Sorry Mr Backlund.
Backlund - Now, in order for you to discomfiture The Tale on the first page, I must ask that you approbate the supplications that I have entrusted upon you to be done at such a time.
The Sam - ......i'm sorry what?
Backlund - The evanescence of apprehension from a preceptor of wrestling onto a...rather elephantine individual such as yourself.
The Sam - ........huh?
Backlund - Enlightenment! discernment on how to trounce the personage of your malevolence.
The Sam - .........ok, well thanks for your time Mr Backlund.
Backlund - And congenial fortunateness on Monday eventide when my tutelage will set you victory wise.
The Sam - Yeah about 11 of them. Seeya.
(The Sam walks off)
Tune in tomorrow to see The Sam train with the Whole F'N Show.
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 9, 2009 6:52:22 GMT -5
(day 3)
(we are outside a gym in Battle Creek, Michigan. The Sam walks to the door. When he opens it a lot of smoke comes out)
(inside we see The Sam trying to clear the heavy fog as he steps on thousands of empty bags of doritos. He finally makes it to a couch where Rob Van Dam and Sabu are watching a "Care Bears" marathon)
The Sam - *clears throat*
RVD - wha? Hey Sabu, check it out, Grimace is here.
The Sam - I'M NOT GRIMACE! I'm The Sam. Remember?
RVD - uuuuuuh
The Sam - Your supposed to be training me today?
RVD - uuuuuh
The Sam - For my match. On Monday. Against The Story.
RVD - uuuuuuh...nope....don't remember that.
The Sam - Well, you did say that. So, when are we going to get started.
RVD - Wait who are you again?
The Sam - THE SAM!
RVD - Oh right. Hang on, let me get my gear. you stay there i'll be back in a minute.
(RVD leaves the building. The Sam sits on the couch with as Sabu continues to watch Care Bears)
The Sam - .........nice pants.
Sabu - ....
The Sam - ....so....you like Care Bears huh?
Sabu - .............
The Sam - ...........ok.....
(9 hours later)
(The Sam and Sabu are still sitting on the couch. RVD bursts into the building carrying several Quiznosl bags)
RVD - Ok 'Bu, got us some Quiznos, every other fast food place was closed so....oh hey, who is are you?
The Sam - I'M THE SAM DAMMIT!
RVD - Wooooooah, relax dude.
The Sam - RELAX!?!? I HAVE BEEN SITTING HERE WATCHING CARE BEARS FOR 9 HOURS WAITING FOR YOU TO TRAIN ME AND YOU GO OUT AND BUY QUIZNOS!!!
RVD - .....uuuuuuuh....i'm training who?
The Sam - That's it, i'm outta here. (The Sam gets up and storms out of the building)
RVD - Seeya Grimace. Man, Grimace sure is angry.
Bill Alfonso - YOUDAMN RIGHT DADDY! *blows whistle*
Tune in tomorrow to see The Sam in his final training session.
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 11, 2009 21:59:44 GMT -5
(last day)
(we see a city, the words "Calgary, Alberta, Canada" appear over the city.)
(we see The Sam standing in the middle of the s uburban street reading a map, he looks up)
The Sam - Yeah, i'm sure this is it.
(the camera pans to show the Hart Family house)
(The Sam walks to the front door and knocks on it. Bruce Hart opens the door)
Bruce Hart- Hello?
The Sam - Hello, is Stu home, My name is The Sam and I would like to be trained in the dungeon please.
Bruce Hart - ....wait, what?
The Sam - This is the Hart Family house right? Home of The Dungeon?
Bruce Hart - ....yeah, but, umm I don't think Stu will be able to train you.
The Sam - Why is that?
Bruce Hart - He's dead.
The Sam - ....really?
Bruce - Yes.
The Sam - ....I didn't even know he was sick.
(6 hours later)
(We see The Sam in a hospital wearing a full body cast)
Will The Sam be able to recover in time for this Mondays Main Event? Will The Family be able to win the main event? Was that I didn't know he was Sick joke too far? tune in to Niteraw this Monday to find out the answers to these questions and many more.
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Eli
New Member
Wat up mah gangstah$?
Posts: 14
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Post by Eli on Apr 11, 2009 22:01:11 GMT -5
Rolling in their graves? I'm pretty sure they already are- laughing their asses off at your pathetic attempts. And by the way- husband? Hah, I'd like to find one who was good enough for me. I'm picky. Unfortunately for you, beggars can't be choosers. Go back to your 'manly' pastimes, pretending to be a fireman and shooting your mid-life crisis buddies with Super Soakers.
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TTS
New Member
Posts: 6
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Post by TTS on Apr 12, 2009 17:01:56 GMT -5
Mista Sammie ja mon
Wha'cha be doin'?
Ya be playin' wit da No Names when ya be lookin' at da WWCF Biggest Sucess stora right here
I be goin from beegin fa Change ta Numba One contenda
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Post by littlenaitch on Apr 12, 2009 20:46:25 GMT -5
Sam you stupid moron!! What the hell were you even doing going to the Hart House? If you wanted someone to train your ass all you had to do was call either me, tyfo or tromboneman and one of us would've trained you. Now you've gone and gotten yourself injured and now have left the three of us in a handicap match against a very good Story team.
*Sigh* I just don't get it Sam. I don't understand why you went out on your own for the training when you have three champions that can easily train you at your fingertips but noooo, you had to do things your way and now you're in a hospital bed up in Calgary cause of your stupid remarks. What do you have to say now Sam?
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 13, 2009 7:55:49 GMT -5
Hello, I am The Sam's doctor. Dr Dave Shultz....and no, I am not THAT Dave Schultz either.
I have ran some tests and it appears The Sam will make a full recovery by Monday. And even though he is still technically in a coma, he asked me to send tis message to you Littlenaitch.
"Littlenaitch, the reason I trained with these other wrestlers was because of 3 reasons.
1) To fulfill my contractual deal with Quiznos Sandwiches. Remember, they taste great.To hang out with Lanny Poffo, that man is the shiz-niz.
3) Can't hurt to get an extra boost once in a while. Unless you do get hut by Bruce Hart because he can't take a joke.
So in conclusion, I will be in the match this Monday, I will eat some Quiznos, and as always, The Family will walk away winners. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Thank you.
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Post by grbjazzman on Apr 13, 2009 15:01:44 GMT -5
Hello, I am The Sam's doctor. Dr Dave Shultz....and no, I am not THAT Dave Schultz either.
I have ran some tests and it appears The Sam will make a full recovery by Monday. And even though he is still technically in a coma, he asked me to send tis message to you Littlenaitch.
"Littlenaitch, the reason I trained with these other wrestlers was because of 3 reasons.
1) To fulfill my contractual deal with Quiznos Sandwiches. Remember, they taste great.To hang out with Lanny Poffo, that man is the shiz-niz.
3) Can't hurt to get an extra boost once in a while. Unless you do get hut by Bruce Hart because he can't take a joke.
So in conclusion, I will be in the match this Monday, I will eat some Quiznos, and as always, The Family will walk away winners. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Thank you.
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The Sam
New Member
The WWCF Manager of Champions,
Posts: 38
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Post by The Sam on Apr 14, 2009 1:10:39 GMT -5
Hello, I am The Sam's doctor. Dr Dave Shultz....and no, I am not THAT Dave Schultz either.
I have ran some tests and it appears The Sam will make a full recovery by Monday. And even though he is still technically in a coma, he asked me to send tis message to you Littlenaitch.
"Littlenaitch, the reason I trained with these other wrestlers was because of 3 reasons.
1) To fulfill my contractual deal with Quiznos Sandwiches. Remember, they taste great.To hang out with Lanny Poffo, that man is the shiz-niz.
3) Can't hurt to get an extra boost once in a while. Unless you do get hut by Bruce Hart because he can't take a joke.
So in conclusion, I will be in the match this Monday, I will eat some Quiznos, and as always, The Family will walk away winners. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
Thank you.
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Eli
New Member
Wat up mah gangstah$?
Posts: 14
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Post by Eli on Apr 14, 2009 7:27:23 GMT -5
The coma sure is a good break. Sam runs his mouth way to much.
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